The Only Sex Tip Every Man Needs

photo by anneschaar

    Don’t cum. That’s it. That’s all you need to know: how to control your ejaculation. Why is this so vital? In order to move into deeper realms of sexual experience – for both you and her – you, the guy, have to be able to prolong that experience. It takes men some time to cool off enough to really get going; and it takes women a while to warm up enough to really get going. It’s when we meet somewhere in between that the real sparks begin to fly. My wife claims that it takes a good two…

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NYT: The “Science” Behind Bisexuality? Thanks, but no thanks

Bisexual Married Man - I Exist

Here’s a recap of the firestorm of bisexual news which began on 23 March, when the New York Times Magazine ran a big cover story on bisexuality: “The Scientific Quest to Prove Bisexuality Exists“, and in particular, male bisexuality. The title alone infers that there is doubt. Once again the burden is on bisexuals to prove their existence in the face of those who doubt us. Researchers and other truthers seem to be comfortable with women being bisexual. But men? It’s not possible. I know in five or ten years we’ll all look back at his silliness and laugh, but…

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The Georgia Straight Interview: Bisexuality and open relationships: transcending myths of monogamy and monosexuality

The Georgia Straight Interview: Bisexuality and open relationships: transcending myths of monogamy and monosexuality

I’d like to thank Craig Takeuchi for using the word “monosexual” in the title of his interview of me, which appears in this week’s Georgia Straight. It’s a term I’ve coined in the past few weeks (anyone else know of its usage?) as I was writing an article on the reasons why so few people are willing to identify as bisexual. Monosexuality refers to those who are only able to be sexually attracted to one sex. Craig did a great job. I entreat you to read it. The article was posted on 5 February, 2014.

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NYT: Tom Daley Ignites the “Great LGBT Debate”. Really? It’s 2014!

I am a bisexual man

It took me a few days to read the 3 January, 2014 New York Times article entitled, Bisexual: A Label With Layers, Tom Daley Comes Out as Bisexual, Igniting L.G.B.T. Debate. I’d quickly scanned the article at first and could see that writer Michael Schulman did an admirable job highlighting the full spectrum of our current cultural biphobia and bidenial, which is what caused me such distress and made the article so difficult to read. Mr. Schulman begins by questioning Tom’s motives for coming out: “Was it a disclaimer? A cop-out? A ploy to hold on to fans? Was he…

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Bisexuals Struggle for Identity Within a Gay & Lesbian (and Trans) World

Please start to recognize the bisexuality exists!

I spent the final month of 2013 baffled by the incredulity, omission, and invisibility of bisexuality, and as such I have resolved that 2014 will be a year of Bisexual Visibility. I urge you, my fellow bisexuals (and those who love us), to join me. In the month of December I had the great pleasure of publishing and promoting my new book, “Confessions of a Bisexual Husband“. It was then that bisexual invisibility really hit home. When I tried to upload my book on Amazon, the only category heading even close to “Bisexuality” was “Gay and Lesbian”. Site after site…

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“Confessions of a Bisexual Husband” is now available!

Mark Bentley Cohen - "Confessions of a Bisexual Husband"

Confessions of a Bisexual Husband is a candid, riveting, erotic account of how a married bisexual man’s coming out to his wife saves their ailing marriage. The book redefines our most dearly-held beliefs about sexuality, monogamy, authenticity, and what it means to truly love someone. The book is available for purchase as an eBook here: AMAZON  and  SMASHWORDS (for non-Kindle versions) Printed copies of the book are available from the author. Please contact Mark if you’d like one sent  to you. If you’re in Vancouver, the book is available at these fine indepent booksellers: Y’s books – I will be…

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Biphobia: Doubting the “B” in “LGBT”


After performing my one-man show, “Bi, Hung, Fit… and Married”, at the Queer Arts Festival in Vancouver during the summer of 2013, my wife and I held Q&A sessions to discuss non-monogamy, bisexuality, and our open relationship. I delve into my life-long struggle with my sexual orientation during the show, where I come to accept the fact that I am indeed bisexual. During one Q&A after the show, an older gay male posed the question: “So you believe that bisexuality is real and it exists?” This, after having spent an hour depicting the steps which led me to openly identifying…

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Should I tell my wife I’m bisexual?

How do I tell my wife I'm bisexual?

I get many email from men asking me, “Should I tell my wife I’m bisexual?”, or “How do I tell my wife I’m bisexual?” I also get email from men who have told their wives they are bisexual (see this post). I will address the topic of coming out to your wife as a bisexual man in this post. It’s been nearly five years since I drove my wife up to the top of a local mountain, parked on the side of the deserted road, and told her I am bisexual and that I’d been “experimenting” with men behind her…

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Self-Acceptance in Bisexuals

Self Acceptance Blues

Why is it we have such difficulty accepting our own sexual desires? In a recent BiFocus meeting we discussed the issue of self-acceptance and coming to terms with desire for both sexes. I asked if it would make a difference if we lived in a world where it was completely acceptable to appear with a male partner one day and a female partner the next. There was no judgment placed upon this type of behaviour. Would it end the confusion? The answer was “No”. It’s not so much about external acceptance as internal: how we feel about our own desire.…

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My Tantric Orgasm


I had a tantric orgasm last night. I call it a tantric orgasm because I had an orgasm without ejaculating. I’m not a tantric sex practioner, and have little more than a cursory knowledge of the subject. I do know quite a bit about orgasm retention though. Please read my post “The Only Sex Tip Every Man Needs”, about the importance of learning to control your ejaculation. Unlike tantric practioners, I believe it’s important for men to ejaculate on a regular basis. This contributes to prostate health, and keeps the system flowing. It’s also an excellent stress relief, emptying the…

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Adventures in Marriage

Riding adventure, Dahab, Egypt

Marriage is serious. We are talking about two people locked into a commitment with legal, moral, social, spiritual and sexual ramifications, for the remainder of their lives. This is a weighty proposition. A heavy load to carry for 40, 50, 60 years. It’s no wonder that most of us don’t make it. My wife and I managed to stay together for 13 years before we realized things were about to end, unless we made drastic changes. I felt as if I was in a marathon, out of steam at the 5 Km mark in a 46 Km event. There was…

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The Time is NOW