The most influential line we draw in our lives is the one we use to define where “I” end, and the “objective world” begins. In other words, what is me, and what is not me: what are the elements of my life that I have influence over, and what are the ones that I do not? Because that is the crux of all of this talk about creating your own reality, writing the novel of your own life experience, being able to have/do/be anything you want.
Some believe we have absolutely no influence over our own lives, beholden to an objective, mechanized, random world of genetics and electro-chemical reactions in the brain that decide everything for us, including what we have for lunch. But most of us can accept that we have some control over our own lives, some ability to affect our own personal outcomes, like whether or not we succeed (use your own arbitrary criteria for success) in school, careers, relationships, running a business, raising a family, pursuing a goal. We’ve all heard about – and many have experienced first-hand – how our inner elements contribute to our success: the power of positive thinking, determination, perseverance, will power, the belief in yourself.
If this is the case, if our thoughts, attitudes and beliefs can affect our lives and outcomes to some degree, then the question is, to what degree? Where is the line? Where does our own power to affect our lives end, and that “other” stuff take over, whatever that other stuff may be: God, Fate, Luck, Genetics, Chaos, Your Neighbour’s Dog?
Is it possible to create a spreadsheet with two columns, one for the things we can influence, and another for the things we cannot? Most of us do not spend too much time trying to decide into which column the events of everyday life fall, although when asked, anyone will tell you there is a definite line:
I can control my expenses and responsibly manage my money, but getting laid off is out of my control; I can control my own driving, but when a guy runs a red and hits me, that is outside the sphere of my influence; I can manage my fitness level and my weight, but cancer is beyond my power; I’ve successfully run my business for 40 years, but I can’t do anything about a big box store from moving in and ruining it.
“Well, of course I believe that attitude is important, but it isn’t everything. There are factors which I cannot control. Sometimes you just have to cross your fingers, look up at the sky, hop on one leg while turning around four times, and hope to God it is granted to you.”
When it comes right down to it, most of us believe attitude is the smallest part of that equation, with the hopping around and praying to God having the largest. Most of us still hold onto the belief that outcomes lie mostly with these external factors: materialist/scientific types and atheists firmly believe in the god of Luck; religious people ascribe outcomes to God; and spiritual people look to the Universe, God, and a host of external forces, depending on their particular philosophical bent (Gaia is angry with us).
I find it interesting to note the remarkable similarity between the scientists’ god of Luck, and the religious/spiritual person’s God:
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– they are both unknowable
– both are uncontrollable (except for finger-crossing for one, and pleading, also known as prayer, for the other)
– neither offers a satisfying world view.
It helps to visualize your life as a Mandala, with you at the very centre of it. You are the lighting rod which attracts and repels every single experience you have had, or not had. Every person, thing, event with which you have come into contact is part of this Mandala, and as such, represents a part of you, reflects a part of you. Each member of your family represents an aspect of yourself, as do your friends, your co-workers, your acquaintances, the people you encounter during your daily experiences, all of them form your ever-changing Mandala and all have one thing in common: you.
There are no lines to be drawn, columns to split, or walls to enclose. The walls you sense are your own creation. You can push up against them, stand at a firing squad in front of them, or walk right through them.
There is nothing random here – at all. Every element of your life is intimately connected to you. There is no experience which you must have, nor any which you cannot have.
The things which have manifested in your life are the end result of a root cause, which is energy, and which is being emitted by you, vibrated by you. You cannot extinguish energy – even science knows that. You can only transform it.
In order to change what you see around you, you must first change what is within you, since the two, are one. Try as you may, you cannot kill, cut, chop, extinguish, blow-up or otherwise get rid of any of these aspects of yourself (which are represented by the events and people in your life), as tempting as these methods are. They will only reappear, as they are being projected outward by you to begin with.
No matter what you believe, your current adventure on earth is finite. If this really is a dream reality in which we can have/do/be anything, then what is it that you desire? That’s usually the hardest question any of us can ask. Your assignment – should you decide to accept it – is to discover what it is that makes your stomach flutter and your spirits soar, and then turn your focus toward its manifestation. Because really, in the face of death, why waste your time doing anything else?
